Well, this should give me something to blog about

Ssssshhhh... It's still early. Got this Monday on day 26 of my cycle.

Thoughts on Parenting

So we are entering the question phase. I got my first "Why...?" today, which I loved! He asked why Daddy wasn't driving (which, I must admit, he usually does when both of us are in the car.)

We are officially at two now. I know a lot of people call two "terrible" but I don't like that. I don't want to wish them away. Yes, we have frequent tantrums, lots of "NO!!!" and a newfound stubbornness ("I NO EGGS!!!" which I think means "That omelette looks lovely mother dear, but I simply don't do eggs.") But overall, two rocks! And, so far, it's way easier than colicky newborn or clingy one-year old, although those ages have their advantages too.

Does it get any better than language? He's getting his eyeteeth right now, and was chewing on his hands. "Does your mouth hurt?" I asked. "No, I alright" is the response. Cool! I mean, that is helpful to know! And darn cute. It's also great to hear him tell me about his day: "Me, Sophie, play trains." And it's hilarious to hear him mimic the adults around him: I was fake crying this morning as part of some make-believe game I can't recall. He heard me and turned quickly to say in a very calm, reassuring kind of voice: "No cry Mummy. LM back SOON!"

Do I find myself getting frustrated at times? Yes. I find I can be sharper with him, particularly if he's whining or teary. "LM, DON'T WHINE LIKE THAT. Just ask in a normal voice!" But overall I think I'm pretty calm.

I had this insight into what my philosophy of parenting is - D and I came up with it together, but I articulated it and D was in total agreement. He was all "Tweet it! Tweet it now!" But I didn't, and so it's probably not going to come out quite the same way. But basically the way that I approach parenting is this: Adjust my expectations of his behaviour so that they're realistic given his age. But treat him with the same kind of respect I'd give an adult. In other words, I try remember that he's a toddler with zero impulse control, limited language, and extremely little control or input over his life. At times it is very frustrating to be him. But when I place demands on him, or expect certain behaviour, I am willing to negotiate, compromise, or even give in if, on reflection, it's not worth the battle, just like I am with the adults in my life. And I don't worry about spoiling him, and more than I worry about spoiling D. Anyway, it's working for me, and keeping me happy and sane; and he is, in my slightly biased opinion, thriving, so it seems to be okay for him too.

Vacation Return

I have been away for the past week having my much-needed vacation. God, it was glorious. I shopped like crazy and spent hours on end with LM. He was a serious trouper as we had him out all day and up late and he adjusted to our vacation schedule and even let us sleep until nine one day! I think he napped in his stroller every single day as we just walked and walked and walked. Absolute heaven.

Vacations really help put things in perspective in terms of where I want to go and what I want to do. For one thing, walking around all these amazing college campuses reminded me how much I loved law school, and how my original goal was to teach. So I think have some big decisions to make about whether that is the path I want to go down. It would mean relocating temporarily, because I would be so much more marketable with a degree from somewhere else, to show a breadth of experience. Luckily D seems completely on board and I know he'd support me if I wanted to do it. There's no rush to decide, but if I do go back, I'd like to do it before I turn 35.

Or is that what I want? Big things to think about.

As for LM, he is going to be 2 sooooo soon! I can't believe it.

Plane Ride

I am going on a plane tomorrow - so much fun. I made the mistake of telling LM about the plane trip - "tomorrow we are going on an airplane!!!" Well, I forgot he doesn't fully grab the concept of future tense, and so he was devastated when we later pulled up at daycare. He burst into tears: "I want ride airplane!" Had to explain it was tomorrow - not sure he fully got that.

Last time we went on a plane, I did something awful. I was that woman. There was a horribly long line and I totally busted into it. Another woman called me on it. "The line starts back there..." she said. I said (oh yes I did) "Yeah, but I have a baby." And I kept on marching, feeling the burning holes in the back of my head. She probably hates all mothers now and thinks we're really that self-righteous. She probably even hates her own mother thanks to me. I could explain why I did it, why it really was important that we get through, but really, there's no excuse.

Anyway I am looking forward to my trip tomorrow!! I so need this little break.